This Is Gonna Hurt
by itsYOUiSEVER
Summary: In which a woman who seems completely normal is Heaven's most wanted and she won't go down without a fight. Castiel X OC Season 4 AU
1. Chapter Zero

**_Author's Note:_**

_Hi there. Welcome to my Castiel fan fiction. A little bit of info for y'all before you start reading is that this is an AU. I will draw inspiration from the show but mostly this will be coming from my own brain. This story takes place just before season 4 when Dean is raised from Hell. I truthfully haven't watched the show since Metatron was first introduced. Honestly, I had lost interest in it all but with the show ending and all, I revisited it and fell back in love. _

_Castiel is like my favorite character ever and I wanted to give him some love while creating my own character to flesh out and just write. If you want help picturing any of my characters, I have them all casted besides Jameson because I can't find an older white male who fits how I imagine him. I will leave my casting at the end of this little prologue. Underneath is a full summary of my story. Let me know what you think of it all and I am open to constructive criticism. _

_Obviously, I do not own any characters you recognize besides the Blackhearts. Thank you for checking my story out. _

* * *

The Blackheart's were legends in the hunting world. Going back generations and many lives had been saved due to the Blackhearts. The Blackhearts were kind soul willing to torture themselves to save other people. Most had scars beyond what anyone had ever seen. Jameson Blackheart had his fair share of scars. From deep scar tissue from claws digging through his skin to bullet wounds caused by his own stupidity. His father had always told him that one day he'd end up trusting the wrong person and he'd never be seen again. Jameson had been a hunting job going after a demon who had been dragging people to hell before their deals had been up when he should have died.

He liked to tell people that Janie had been his saving grace, his angel sent from heaven. To most, it was a term of endearment, not a factual statement. Janie had decided to live as humans did. She wanted to know what it meant to live. Little did she know her life would turn out the way it did. Mykie had been a miracle, something that shouldn't have been able to happen but she did. The Blackhearts made their way across the country and back, saving people and killing horrid creatures, collecting wandering souls along the way.

Johnny's parents had been killed by a werewolf and Ripley, she was supposed to die due to an insane car crash she had been in but her father had made a deal with a demon to let her live. Jameson and Janie took in these lost children and made them a part of their family. One big happy hunting family.

Although they were well known in the hunting community, really no hunters had ever met them. They kept to themselves for Mykie and Janie's safety. Most wouldn't understand. They'd see them as monsters, not the way that the Blackhearts saw them. Often if they needed to assist on a hunt, Mykie and Janie were left behind to do research and look for the next hunt.

Until one day, Janie went missing. There had been nothing pointing to where she had gone and on top of that, strange things were happening with Mykie to the point where it wasn't easy to hide what she truly was.

She had begun to hear voices in her head, whispers of the Devil and God. A name repeated in her head. Sabriel. It was hard for Mykie not to just give in to the fact that she was crazy. All signs pointed to the fact that she had lost it completely.

The Blackhearts, they stuck together through it all. They rallied together when Jameson was killed by a demon on a power trip. At this point in time. Mykie didn't know her full capabilities and that would haunt her forever. And it all was just beginning.

* * *

**chapter zero | questions better left unanswered**

He watched the raven-haired woman with curious eyes. He shouldn't be there but in the end, he was there. He had questions and doubts that he needed answered. Why she would rebel in such a way and risk eternal life for what she had gained. He didn't understand. Her striking blue eyes lifted to meet his gaze and he was motionless.

"Castiel, to what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" Sabriel spoke lowly at him with a tinge of sympathy like she knew what was going through his head.

He didn't quite know how to address her anymore. Sabriel was her Heaven given name but down on Earth, she had been going by Janie Blackheart.

Back on Earth, she had a family. One that was searching for her tirelessly. One child of hers was looking desperately, Mychaela. Castiel had heard her cries to the angels for her mother to be alive and OK because she had just lost her father. He had tried to talk to the woman but he stopped himself before he did so. He shouldn't talk to the abomination. That was what she was. Half angel, half human. A Nephilim.

"Why did you do it? Why did you rebel?" Castiel asked her finally.

She didn't answer him right away, contemplating her response. She thought back to her family on Earth. Her trueborn daughter, Mychaela who she knew was distraught without her. They had been close due to their similarities. Sabriel was the one person who knew what she was going through. There was still so much for her to learn about her abilities that Janie's heart hurt, knowing she'd probably never be able to teach her them.

Her mind moved to her son, Johnny. He had to be off hunting the nearest monster trying to keep his mind off the fact that the maternal figure in his life was missing. Probably was sitting in a crap motel room with a beer in hand, hopefully still with his sisters and not on his own.

Then there was the youngest, Ripley. She hid it all deep down, rarely ever showing emotions but Janie could imagine what was going through her head.

Then she pictured her beloved James and his smile.

"If you met my family, you would know exactly why I did it. To live as humans do, to feel emotions as powerfully as they do, it is a blessing and a curse. Have you not ever wondered what it is that makes humans fight so hard to just live? That is why I chose my family."

Her explanation didn't answer his questions to relieve his doubt, it just amplified everything he had been feeling. He didn't understand how emotions could be worth so much. He knew this was all written over his face clear as day. Sabriel and he were alike. She had been this way before rebelling and he feared the worst for himself. He wondered if rebelling would be inevitable or if he could possibly stop himself. He was too curious about humans, maybe if he just stayed up in Heaven, he would be ok. He would just be a good soldier.

Then she spoke words that he knew would be burned into his brain.

"Rebellion isn't as bad as they make it out to be. Heaven, it isn't all that and a bag of chips as Jameson would say. How can we follow someone so blindly and we haven't even seen him. I haven't ever seen him and I know you haven't so why are you so sure that what I did was wrong and not what God wanted. I know you have doubts as well because we are alike. Promise me something, Castiel," Sabriel began to say to him as she waited for some kind of indication that he was really listening to her. "Look out for Mychaela, please. She isn't an abomination. She is my daughter. I know I am asking you to break rules but she needs guidance. Now more than ever with the Apocalypse inevitably coming."

"I don't," Castiel began to say as he thought about what she was asking of him. He was supposed to get Dean Winchester out of hell before the Apocalypse was put into motion. In the back of his mind, Castiel knew that the first seal had already been broken.

If he were to mentor Mychaela, he would inevitably be caught by Heaven and end up in the same boat as Sabriel and Mychaela would probably be dead. This whole thought relied on the fact that Mychaela didn't try to kill him the moment he made himself known to her. If she was anything like Sabriel, then she'd have him pinned to the ground before he could even get a word out.

"I can't promise you that. You know that I cannot." Castiel finally said softly, not wanting to make her angry.

He dared to look at her and was met with sympathetic eyes. She was smiling at him. She knew that this seed of doubt had been planted in him and she knew him. He'd go to Mychaela eventually.

"It is ok, Castiel. Go do things for God. See where that gets you." She said to him as he decided that this was the best time to leave.

"Goodbye, Sabriel."

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_

_So what did ya think? I apologize for the shortness of this but it is just to introduce you to my story. Please let me know what you thought and let me tell you who I imagine each of my characters as._

_Mychaela "Mykie" Blackheart portrayed by Jaimie Alexander _

_Johnny Blackheart portrayed by Stephen Amell_

_Ripley Blackheart portrayed by Astrid Berges Frisbey_

_Janie Blackheart/Sabriel portrayed by Kate Beckinsale_

_Obviously, if you picture different people, go right ahead. _

_But again thank you for taking the time to check out my story, I hope you liked it and I will see you soon._


	2. Chapter One

**chapter one | the voices in my head, they want me dead**

Mykie had chosen to lock herself up in Bobby Singer's attic for the safety of her siblings. Since her Father's death and her Mother's disappearance, she had become unstable. Her abilities, they did what they wanted. It was like a part of her brain wanted to take control of the rest of her. Every part of her being was being overloaded. Between the voices in her head and the random objects being thrown across the room, Mykie was losing her mind.

She had completely lost it at her Father's funeral. They had decided to salt and burn his body in Bobby's backyard and Mykie just caved. She completely leveled every tree in a 200 yard radius of where she had been standing and fainted right afterwards. Seeing what happened to Mykie, caused Johnny to just need time to himself.

Johnny was off God knows where doing whatever he pleased. She didn't question his coping mechanisms. He often texted her letting her know he was alive. She knew Johnny could take care of himself but she worried that he was not thinking straight but then again, neither was she.

Ripley was downstairs. Mykie could hear her talking to Bobby. This separation was hardest of Ripley. Mykie knew her younger sister needed her but at this point, it wasn't safe to be around her. She didn't have control of herself. Not really.

Mykie heard soft steps coming up the stairs leading to the attic and she knew Ripley was coming up to talk to her. The small doorway opened and she was met with cool blue-silver eyes. There was a chair just next to the door that Ripley immediately sat herself down in, knowing her sister was going to tell her to leave because it wasn't safe to be around her. Ripley wasn't having that.

The two had always been close and used to be attached at the hip when they were younger. Mykie was about five years older than Ripley. The brunette definitely took after both of her siblings. Being just as stubborn and hardheaded as the other Blackhearts.

"How are you feeling?" Mykie asked her sister as the brunette scoffed while she shook her head.

"It is funny that you are asking me that, when you leveled half the county yesterday," Ripley replied to her sister's question. "I am fine. I'll live but the real question is what is going on with you?"

That was the question of the hour. What the fuck was going on with Mykie? Between the voices in her head and the inability to stop objects from being chucked across the room, the raven-haired woman was going to have an aneurysm just trying to comprehend it all.

Since she could remember, her parents pushed the idea that Mykie needed to keep her abilities secret because people just wouldn't understand and that there were monsters out there that would try to take advantage of her. She knew what she was to the other angels, an abomination. Something that should have never really happened. Mykie knew that she was probably the reason her father was dead and her mother was missing.

Johnny was under the impression that it had been a demon who killed their father but Mykie hadn't smelled sulfur when she found his body. She had found a single feather though. It had felt like a looming presence had been standing over her when she walked into the motel room they had been staying in to find her father thrown across the room with his neck broken. It hadn't been a demon that killed her father in cold blood and Mykie was determined to find whoever had done this and make them pay.

"I'm hearing voices, Rip. They keep talking inside my head, repeating the name _Sabriel_ and _the abomination _over and over again. All I can feel is this presence coming. I cannot describe it, Rip. Something big is coming and I'm fucking losing it." Mykie said in defeat as she admitted everything to her younger sister.

Ripley didn't fully understand what her sister was going through but she knew it had to be bad if she was opening up to her about it. Mykie didn't like when attention was on her or to burden others so the pure fact that she was letting her sister into her mind said it all.

Ripley got up from the chair she was sitting in and moved to her sister's side, wrapping an arm around Mykie's shoulders. The dark-haired woman leaned into the younger one and sighed, allowing everything on her mind just trickle down.

"Let's go into the junkyard and get some semi fresh air. Then we can come back in and see if Bobby can't find anything about Nephilim and maybe we will find out the cause of the voices." Ripley suggested to her older sister as Mykie nodded her head at her words, knowing that if anyone could find anything that might help her it would be Bobby.

The two stood up from the bed and began to make their way downstairs when Mykie heard a voice echo through her head like a pinball.

_Jophiel, you have been told to stay away from her until we know more. _

Mykie shook her head and brushed the voice away. Just as she was about to leave the room, she grabbed her mother's Angel blade as she called it. Just so that she had something on her because in the back of her mind, she knew something wasn't right.

She walked into the kitchen area with Ripley where Bobby was currently eating a sandwich with two more sitting on a plate next to him. He gestured towards the sandwiches with a smile on his face.

"Figured, you'd be hungry since you've been up there awhile." He stated nonchalantly.

Mykie smiled at him and graciously took the sandwich in her hands, taking a generous bite. She could taste every little piece of the sandwich from the mayo to the small bits of peppers in the cheese. She gave Bobby a toothy mouth full of food smile and motioned for her sister to move towards the door leading outside.

The moment Mykie stepped outside, the air felt heavy. Like there was something there. A presence. She looked around at the area and couldn't place where she was feeling this power coming from. Her hand wrapped around the heel of her Angel blade and she pulled it out of her coat.

Ripley must have noticed the change in Mykie's demeanor cause she immediately asked what was wrong. The raven-haired girl turned towards her sister only to see a man standing behind her with a menacing look across his whole face.

"RIP!" Mykie screamed in horror as this creature threw her sister into the side of a car. The sound of pain that escaped her lips made Mykie see red.

"Who the fuck are you?" Mykie demanded as she positioned herself into an attack stance.

He didn't answer her. He just kept moving towards her.

The next words that came out of her mouth, Mykie would probably regret.

"Jophiel, right? Thought Heaven told you to leave me the fuck alone."

He snarled his teeth at her and tried to throw her like he had done with Ripley but she didn't move an inch. He looked at her with a surprised expression on his face and she smirked at him. She charged at him with her blade raised and stabbed it into his shoulder, causing him to cry out. She wasn't trying to kill him, not just yet. She wanted to know why Heaven was coming after her.

Mykie heard Ripley groan and try to get up which distracted her just enough to get backhanded by Jophiel which sent her flying into a car. He began to move towards the younger Blackheart and Mykie screamed in anguish. Next thing she knew, she was standing in front of her sister. He seemed just as surprised as she was when she did so but Mykie took it as an opportunity to get her sister on her feet.

The sound of rustling feathers drew all their attention to their left and standing there was a man. He had dark brown hair that wasn't brushed and soul piercing blue eyes. His expression was emotionless. He was wearing a trenchcoat over a full suit. He glanced at the Blackhearts but then turned his full attention to Jophiel and Mykie was happy to not be on the receiving end of that stare.

"Jophiel, you were warned. You have disobeyed Heaven." It took Mykie a minute but she recognized that low voice. It had been one she heard often in her head.

"Castiel, she is an abomination. She should be obliterated." Mykie narrowed her eyes at his words and Ripley clung to her sister because otherwise she'd fall over without support.

The two men squared off and Mykie didn't know what was going to happen. They both had this glow to them. They were angels. She knew that much for sure but how powerful they were, she had no clue. Her mother had told her about the different ranks of angels and Mykie knew she didn't want a run in with any Archangels.

Jophiel pulled her angel blade out of his shoulder and tossed to the side. Mykie then scrambled to grab it so she could protect her sister. The man in the trench glanced at her and she couldn't help but wonder who he was.

"Heaven will thank me for this." Jophiel said as he moved to attack Mykie but suddenly she wasn't where he thought she was. She appeared behind Jophiel and grabbed a fistful of his hair. She then raised her angel blade and slid it across his throat. This glowing smoke spilled out of his wound and his body crumbled to the ground.

Mykie immediately looked up in horror, really hoping she wouldn't have to kill another angel but she was ready to do so. Castiel sighed and ran a hand over his face.

Bobby was about to come running to their rescue but Mykie held her right hand out flat to signal for him to stay back.

"I had it under control." He spoke directly at her and she raised an eyebrow at his words. "You've just made things more complicated for yourself, Mychaela."

He studied her for a moment. She was wearing a white t shirt that basically was see through. Her entire body was covered in various tattoos. From neck to ankle, her body had ink everywhere. His eyes settled on the sparrow peaking out from underneath the collar of her shirt and he took in all the details. He wondered to himself how long all these pieces of art had taken to get some.

Then abruptly, he disappeared without a word.

Bobby then ran out to check on Ripley who was hunched over in pain. Mykie immediately dropped the angel blade and came to her sister's side. She placed a hand on her shoulder and this power surged through her. Ripley then was fine. She felt no pain.

They both looked at Mykie in surprise and all she could do is shrug. She didn't know half of what she really could do as a Nephilim.

"We need to call Johnny."

•••••

Howdy! This chapter took way too long to write but I really enjoyed writing it. Hope you guys like it!


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